Dear Gwendolyn,

Hi there, I recently got cheated on and dumped. I found out my partner cheated on our two year anniversary. They cheated on me with some close friends of mine. What should I do? 

Sincerely, 

Dumped 

Dear Dumped, 

I’m so sorry to hear you’ve been cheated on. I imagine you must be devastated and feeling hurt, alone, confused, betrayed, and sad. In addition to this, you are dealing with the betrayal of your close friends who have gone behind your back and cheated on you too. The fact that you found out on your two-year anniversary with your ex is just the cherry on top of this already tragic ice cream sundae. 

I advise you to never speak to those “friends” again. You deserve the kind of friends who would tell you immediately if your partner tried to flirt with them. The kind of friends who also show up to your house with donuts and your favorite movie to try to cheer you up, even though your ex doesn’t deserve your precious sadness and tears. And yet, we are all human, so crying and sadness are part of life no matter how undeserving of our tears the person we are crying over is. 

Lastly, I know this part might shock you but I advise you to be grateful for this breakup. Before you think I’m crazy and question my sanity, hear me out. The person who broke your heart is unworthy of it. Thank them for revealing the kind of person they are and the kind of person your supposed “friends” are. Thank them for leaving your life as soon as they possibly could, so you can make room for new people who appreciate every part of you. And I promise the right people will find you and love you for you. 

Allow yourself time to be devastated-hurt-alone-confused-sad over this betrayal but remember the sadness will end eventually. What’s left after the sadness is entirely up to you, Dumped. You could be bitter and angry forever or choose to be thankful and ready for better. I hope you choose the second option. 

Sincerely,

Gwendolyn