Horoscopes: From Beyond the Beyond the Beyond: The Beyond
April 16, 2018
Pisces
February 19-March 20
If you don’t succeed, try again. If you still don’t succeed, maybe try something that requires a little less skill and talent.
Aries
March 21-April 19
Just have as much fun as possible. It’s never that serious.
Taurus
April 20-May 20
I don’t care what they’ve told you, you’re great, kid.
Gemini
May 21-June 20
Sometimes you’re just not cut out for that particular skill. Have you tried crochet? Or playing an instrument? Coloring is fun too.
Cancer
June 21-July 22
There’s nothing like making someone smile. I hope you get that chance to make someone smile today. Even if that someone is yourself.
Leo
July 23-August 23
You’re going to do great things. Even if you don’t think so.
Virgo
August 23-September 23
There’s no time like the present! I know you embarrass yourself often, but who cares? You’re good.
Libra
September 23-October 22
Realize your full potential and step into it. We can always accomplish far more than we think.
Scorpio
October 23-November 21
So maybe you don’t have to give up. Just work harder. If you’ve never felt like quitting, you haven’t worked hard enough.
Sagittarius
November 22-December 21
Congratulations on being really cool. I think you’re really great (in a friend way – don’t make it weird).
Capricorn
December 22-January 19
Don’t want to do homework today? Just save it for tomorrow. Tomorrow comes and it’s still today. Tomorrow is a relative term – we’re never getting there (Makes Annie more depressing).
Aquarius
January 20-February 18
Don’t take any of my advice seriously. As far as you know, I may not even be a real person. These could be corny computer-generated horoscopes, calculated at the push of a button on some really tacky software.